The Little Red Hen--who for years has been plagued by her freeloading farm companions--has reportedly executed many of her freeloading farm companions! In the wake of growing food prices, theft of produce has been on the rise. Several farm animals were suspected by the Little Red Hen of stealing her tomatoes. One bovine witness told the Underground Reporter that the Little Red Hen came out with "some kind of boom-stick" and opened fire on the alleged tomato thieves!Said the Little Red Hen, "You want to take my tomatoes, but you sorry sons-of-chickens never want to help plant them! Well, I got something for that a**! Say hello to my little friend!"
The Little Red Hen-House compound is currently surrounded by the police. The best case scenario is that the Little Red Hen will surrender quietly. The worst case scenario is that there will be a full confrontation with weapons and the surviving offices will have a nice poultry dinner.
